How Not to Be a Dick (Part 2: When Ethics Leave the Building)

 

If Part 1 was the warm-up act, this is where the show went full dark comedy. Because Dick wasn’t just an obnoxious boss—he was an ethical hazard zone.

The Union Bust

We fired a union organizer for documented violations, and I spent a week combing through dusty HR files to build a defense. We won. The unfair labor practice charge was investigated by the NLRB, including hourly employees providing testimony about being disciplined, and the charge was dismissed, and the union campaign dissipated.

Victory, right?

Not so fast. Employees started dropping by my office asking for me to pull their write-ups from their files. That’s when I discovered Dick had paid employees to lie under oath during the hearing.

That was also the moment I knew it was time to start plotting my exit.

Hazardous Waste, Literally

The final straw came courtesy of the state Department of Natural Resources.

An inspector visited the plant, asking for hazardous waste record documentation. We were unable to provide them and asked him to give us some time to review the records. That night, the same DNR rep showed up at my house—in front of my kids—demanding I come clean about what was happening at the plant.

The next day, I began searching for the paperwork related to the waste disposal. Nothing. No records. No compliance. Just a giant, regulatory black hole.

When I told Dick, he waved it off. By the next day, the issue had “disappeared.” No lawsuit. No fine. No follow-up. Just… gone.

That’s when I realized this wasn’t just unethical—it was dangerous.

So… How Not to Be a Dick

You don’t need to be a crook to be a bad boss. But Dick managed to be both.

Here are a few lessons he taught me—none of which he meant to:

• Don’t weaponize fear.
• Don’t fake transparency.
• Don’t break the law to win.
• Don’t ignore your conscience.
• Don’t be a Dick.

Lesson: You can patch over a lot of leadership sins. But once you cross into dishonesty and danger, you’re not just bad at your job—you’re bad for humanity.

Next time: Meet Ron. He smoked a pipe, drove a Pinto, and once tried to conduct a uniform inspection in the middle of a Michigan blizzard.